Updated: Oct 3
Our limiting beliefs and how it shows up in our lives
When adults don’t meet a child’s fundamental needs, the child does not know how to blame the adult, so they blame themselves instead. A child can never meet their own needs. Their basic needs are:
I need to feel significant
I need to feel loved
I need to feel I matter
I need to feel celebrated
I need to feel my parents are proud of me
When your needs are not met, two things can happen:
1. You believe they will never be met. Such children grow up to be very pessimistic, anxious, angry, always looking for the worst possible outcomes.
2. You give up on your needs or you give up your needs to someone else.
When you give your needs to someone else, such children often become very needy in relationships forming unrealistic expectations from their partners. What they are actually asking their partners is to constantly meet their unmet needs. This becomes mission impossible and is causing constant conflicts with other people. For example, such person constantly expects from their partner to know how they feel without clearly communicating this to the other person.
These feelings formed in childhood can go on to last a lifetime.
Because I don’t feel safe, I can’t take risks. I stay in situations that are familiar even though it creates dissatisfaction and suffering.
Because I feel unlovable, I hold myself back. I suffer in silence and always blame others for my unhappiness. I never express what I want, and I get frustrated when others don't see it.
Because I feel unworthy, I do not aim high. For example, such a person can be extremely skillful at something but will never be recognized and seen at their workplace. This creates a feeling of disconnect and resentment.
Rapid Transformational Therapy, RTT®, helps the client to recognize all that and overcome it in minimal sessions. Using hypnosis as one of the tools we get to these core stories much faster than other therapeutic methods. That's probably one of the main reasons why this therapy method gives breakthroughs when other approaches take longer. But most importantly, we get to remove and change those beliefs using the principles of neuroplasticity and neuroscience.